600m for my first outing after almost a full year's lack of activity is actually pretty good. I'll take it. The sun felt good on my skin and with medication in my system, I managed to eke out a workout while still having a desperately sore throat. I'm suitably impressed. I might have made it 1km but I didn't have time. A little color will do me some good too. Being pale is just not me.
The past year set me back a lot. I thought I only had one symptom: tachycardia. A fast heartbeat. To the tune of 125-135 bpm at rest regularly, and peaking at 157. Who knew it would lead to the diagnosis of Grave's disease or hyperthyroidism? But in reality, I had lost weight without realising it because I wasn't one for tight clothing anyway. But yeah I'll take that too. And I also did have an incredibly fast digestion rate, which meant....! All this was surely better than what my doctor was thinking. Worst case scenario, something was wrong with my heart, my arteries were blocked and I'd need a stent inserted. No thanks, thank you very much. I'll take the thyroid problem and see you the rest.
I was always feeling less than 100%, that was certain. Now I had the diagnosis, what would ensue was a series of tests, pills, forced inactivity, radioactivity and isolation. Fun, right? Not exactly.
So I was told that I could take pills to suppress my hormones and stay on them for up to a year and continue to enjoy the weight loss without even trying (yay!). But with an impending trip back home, and the observation of dry and flaky skin coupled with acne, I chose to end my suffering once and for all. Why prolong this for a few pounds? It also meant that I could not be active, I had to avoid sun and I had to avoid caffeine. Caffeine is easy because I don't really crave it. I can't be active? That's hard. Avoid sun? In Malaysia - super hard!
I could get rid of my thyroid by having it surgically removed or take a radioactive I-131 pill to kill off the active nodules and in effect render my entire thyroid worthless without having surgery. The former would get rid of all symptoms at once, and the latter would make my symptoms taper off. The former was also risky because my vocal chords were close to the thyroid. One wrong move and I'd be in deep trouble.
I chose the I-131. After taking this, one is told that one has to be at least 3 ft away from people for a week so they are not contaminated by radioactivity. And the distance from children should be double that. This was the hardest thing to do: not hugging and kissing my Zoe, not holding her close. It was torture. One week was. After one week, I went in for a test and my levels were still high, so they suggested let's try one month away from children. Argghh!! They didn't think to tell me this before I chose this option. Of course they didn't. In fact it was normal to stay away from children for up to a month. You're also given a Travel Advisory Card to certify that you have had radioactive treatment, valid 3 months from the date you receive treatment so you can prove that you don't have explosives on you if airport bomb detectors go off. Wow. Blow me down..why don't you?
Luckily all that is behind me now and I'm happily taking my replacement hormones for my thyroid that I have to take daily. I am well, I am determined to live an unencumberedly active lifestyle. Because every second I am alive counts. I have learned that many times over.
Anyway I digress. I swim because it's a childhood activity that I absolutely fell in love with. It is weightless and freeing. When I'm in the water, I can think. I run strategies in my head, I think about life's issues and how I can resolve them. I even run through scenarios that happened before and how I would have handled things differently. Even with my dangly earrings rattling through the quietness of being underwater, I find clarity. A quiet that is only interrupted by my thoughts. I plan what I'm going to do next. It's just always brought me a modicum of peace. No one yacking in my ear! It's almost like night time when all is well. Not night time when you're missing someone or thinking of lost loves and adventures. A good feeling to have, that is. I'm going to make more of those feelings.
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